David

I have been asking the “why” questions again.  I received an e-mail from my friend today.  David Witherspoon, a 16 year old young man who attended our church, was shot and killed on Friday night.  He was a great kid and was just in the wrong place at the wrong time.  His life had barely begun…I wonder who he would have become?  What things would he have accomplished?  Whose lives would he have touched?  All the hopes of who he was to become were taken away in an instant.

I have many memories of David.  When he was five years old, we went to watch some of the older guys play basketball.  We walked to the corner store and he bought M & M’s.  He sat on my lap to watch the game and fell asleep.  It always touches me when a child falls asleep in your arms…it speaks of their simple trust in you.

He used to go swimming with us and we would play basketball together.  Over the years, he grew older and I moved to Nepal.  In many ways I lost touch with him.  But I will remember his gentle strength.  He was quiet, yet carried himself with confidence.  His life was a gift to all who knew him.

My heart is heavy today for his friends and family.  My heart aches for them as they grieve.  I am thinking of his twin sister Danielle.  I am thinking of the guys and girls who grew up alongside of David and feel his absence every minute.

I don’t even pretend to know why this kind of thing happens in the world.  I don’t understand the gravity of suffering that many people experience.  But I know that Jesus is present with us.  I know that He grieves with us and holds us in his arms.  I pray that today Jesus’ presence would be felt by those grieving today.

My prayer is simple:  Come, Lord Jesus.  Come.

A Broken heart…

Well, it has been way to long since I have written on this thing.  This keeping in touch thing is not going so well.  But I want to get back into it.  I want people to have a window into my life here and be a part of my journey here.

At the end of July Silas, Kim, Jedi, Adia, Eli and Priya West returned to the States after 10 years of service in Nepal.  They were our Field Directors, our friends and our family here.  It was a privilege to serve alongside of them for almost 5 years.  It has been a month already since they have left and I miss them still.  I miss Jedi’s random facts about crocodiles, Adia’s clutzy dance moves, Elijah saying, “kick it out” instead of “check it out” and Priya’s growling voice.  Jesse Heirendt is our new Field Director.  He is a really great guy…keep him in your prayers as he walks into this new season of leadership.

I got the opportunity to play in a basketball tournament here in Kathmandu.  Our team was called the Snow Leopards (an incredibly fierce name), the average age of our team was 32ish and we played against 16 and 17 year olds.  But it was a BLAST!  We ended up winning the tournament (it helped that we had 3 players over 5′10″ and were playing against 5′3″ girls) and got certificates and medals.  We are going out to celebrate our victory tonight.  And I must say, we had the best fans!  A special shout out goes to Calvin and Liz…the Snow Leopards Super Fans!  They were learning how to say in Nepali, “Ref, get some glasses.”  Ha ha, they were certainly a force to be reckoned with.

Today I began volunteering at a childrens home in Kathmandu.  This particular home receives every baby that is abandoned at local hospitals or police stations.  It was opened in 1964 and is in an old palace.  From the outside it looks like a ghost town, but as you walk inside the little voices of over 200 children can be heard.  There are kids from the age of 20 days (so sweet!) all the way up to 16 years old.

Since returning to Nepal, I have not felt like I can just pick up and continue the work I was doing with the young men addicted to drugs.  For whatever reason, I did not feel released by God to do that.  I have been focusing on language, but have missed having people to pour my life into.  The past months Brook and I have had numerous experiences with babies.  I recently got to be at the hospital with another friend as she delivered a precious baby girl.  Brook has been working with a young teenager who just had a baby boy.  Brook actually saw a baby who was dead in the trash pile near the river where we live.  Many people abandon their babies near or in the river.  Through many of these experiences, we have just felt drawn to work with babies.  After hearing about this childrens home, we were both excited to go and hold these little ones.  Each Friday I hope to go there, hold them, feed them, change their diapers and play with them.  It is simple really, but touch is so important for these little ones.

Today I arrived at the childrens home and jumped right into it.  I am working in a room with about 19 or 20 babies and two staff members.  They are so hungry for touch and love being held.  There is a little one year old girl that is blind.  I picked her up and she touched my face with her little hands.  She nestled her head on my shoulder and seemed so content.  The moment I set her down, she arched her back, slammed her head against the bed, and screamed.  I felt so sad because I knew that I could not give that little girl what she needs.

Working in this home has broken my heart again.  As hard as that is, it is so good too.  I feel like since I have returned to Nepal, I have been guarding my heart a bit.  It hurts sometimes to feel deeply for people.  But I feel like God is allowing my heart to be made soft again for people and to struggle through the hard questions of life.  As I look at those little kids, I wonder what their lives will be like.  I wonder where God is in a world of suffering.  I wonder what it would have been like for me to grow up in a home like that.  I wonder about God’s heart to see the “lonely placed in families.”

So many images are in my mind from today. There is a little five year old boy with Downs Syndrome who just grabbed me and would not let me go.  There is this little blind 5 month old baby who laughed when I held her in my arms.  There is a little baby boy who fell asleep in my arms.  There is the woman that has worked 24 hrs a day for 2 years in that home.

And I feel God’s love rising up in me.  His heart to proclaim words of life and truth over these little ones.  His heart to see these little ones loved and told that they are precious in His sight.  Please keep us in your prayers as we serve there.  We really want to help the women that work so hard at that home and just love on these little ones.

Some randomness…

Hey everyone! I started my language classes last week. I have been meeting with Binnu everyday and have been trying to go out into my neighborhood and practice what I am learning. I think that people are amused by me as I stumble through the new things I am learning. I am enjoying the time with people and it is fun to be learning new words and ways of saying things. At the end of the day, my brain is fried. Last night I fell into bed at 10:30pm. Brook was creeped out because she could hear me talking in my sleep. If you ever want to know anything from me, just wait until I start talking in my sleep:)

I have been playing basketball on Tuesday nights with my friends John and Calvin. We play at the American school here in an actual gym. It is mostly guys, but there are two other girls that play. It is highly competitive and I actually shot an airball two weeks in a row:( But I am having a blast and it is a great way to relieve stress. Brook, Pawan and I went swimming last week at a sports complex. It was so much fun. After a couple hours of swimming, I feel like i have been on a retreat for a week. It is so relaxing and something I want to try to keep doing during the summer months.

I rode a bike for the first time in Nepal. In Nepal they call motorcycles “bikes” and bikes “cycles.” So I rode a cycle for the first time. Calvin took me out and I rode Andrew’s cycle while he was in the village. We rode around the monkey temple and it was really fun. We went down a really steep hill and I did yell out in a panic, “CAAAAALLLLLVINNN!” But he didn’t hear me because he was already way ahead of me.

I am still trying to get into a flow of being here. We are at a transition point with a lot of visitors here and coming, Silas and Kim returning from Thailand and then going to the States, and new leadership. It is easy to feel a bit unstable in the midst of things. I am still trying to figure out my schedule and what things/people that I want to be investing in. I hope that as things settle more, I would continue to learn to live whole and healthy here in Nepal.

The political climate in Nepal is pretty tense right now as well. The government officials are meeting this morning and there has been a lot of disunity. We are really unsure of what the future holds and really need your prayers for this nation right now.

I am going to close with a really random question that I need your help on.  I met with my landlord yesterday. His son, daughter-in-law, and grandson live in Florida. His son’s visa for the States will end in December. His grandson was born deaf and has a feeding tube. They desire to stay in the States for the treatment of his son. I can tell that my landlord is really worried and I would like to help him in any way that I can. Does anyone have any insight on the process of receiving a visa for the States? Are there places that will advocate for this? Let me know if you have any thoughts…I really feel burdened for my landlord and his wife, and want to show them the love of Jesus in a practical way.

Another week…

Some highlights of the week

1. I have set a new record since being back in Nepal…In just 2 weeks time, I have head lice! I have no idea how I got it so quick. Rekha was like, “Let me check your head.” And I was like, “Oh, I don’t have it, but you can look.” Little did I know…

2. I am sitting on my balcony right now watching a monkey on a neighbor’s roof….She just came out with a stick and it jumped up near the water tank. Those monkeys are dangerous…just ask my friend Maggie!

3. We went to a BBQ with our friends Bill and Janet last Saturday night. It was amazing food and great conversation. We also were the “horses” for Jedi, Adia, Elijah and Priya. (Silas and Kim’s kids) At one point, Adia divided us into teams: Jesse was a work horse, Brook and I were on the “slow team” and Andrew and Calvin were on the “fast team”.

4. I spent one day with Gautam and Rekha visiting our friend Shanta and her children. It was fun to spend some quality time with them. They had puppies at the home we visited and I wanted to take one home so badly.

5. I feel like I have had some good time with Jesse, Andrew and Calvin this week. I am excited to serve alongside these guys. Last night while walking to Thamel, this guy I know came up to me. He was a bit drunk and the guys stood between him and I. It was such a good feeling to be protected. Thanks guys!

6. Seeing Jeebas, Buddha, and Sagar in Thamel. It was so good to see some of the guys that we have poured so much into. But it was hard to see them struggling again. They have a special place in my heart and I will continue to entrust them to Jesus.

7. I had a little Nepali mishap this week. I got the word for eggplant and vomit mixed up. There is a big difference, folks.

8. Starting the exercise program with Andrew, Calvin, Jesse and Brook. I ran up to the monkey temple one day. It was very challenging and I am out of shape. But I am excited to be exercising more often. While I was climbing the stairs to the monkey temple, this man came up to me and asked me, “jiwan ke ho?” (what is life?) He said a number of things in English…life is hell-fire, life is tension, there is no Jesus, etc. I was trying to have this theological conversation while gasping for air and let’s just say it was not going too well. Jesse was like, “Could you wait until we get to the top?” Ha ha.

9. I learned to make daal. (lentils) I feel pretty confident now and am excited to go out and buy a pressure cooker. We also bought two wall hangings for our house. It is feeling more and more like a home. I am going to try and go to a greenhouse this week and buy some flowers for our balcony.

10. Tonight we are going to see Prince Caspian at the theatre. Yeah!

11. We went to Nepali church this morning. I used to go to this church and it was really good to see some old friends. It was good to worship with Nepali believers.

12. Seeing Ajay. He is this little five year old boy that had been living on the streets. Last year, we were able to get him into a home for boys that my pastor runs. He was really beginning to thrive there. Since that time, his parents have taken him back. It was so good to see his precious smile and play Hide and Seek with him. I love this boy as my own and want what his best for him. Keep praying for him.

13. I just feel a lot of peace in being here. It feels good and it feels right. Keep praying that God would fill me with His joy.

14. Last one…I found a language helper. Her name is Binnu and we are going to start meeting in one week. Five days a week we will meet and she is going to help me with my Nepali. She is really cool and I think we will become good friends.

I made it!

Well, I made it safe and sound. I met Calvin and Charlie in Newark and flew to Delhi. I only had to be on the plane a total of 15 hours to Nepal…crazy, huh? We had great flights and I slept a ton. Gautam, Rekha, Brook, Andrew and Jesse met me at the airport. It was good to reconnect with everyone. I had my first plate of daal-bhaat (rice and lentils) at the Rai’s on Sunday. It tasted so good. My phone is not working right now so people have been calling Brook’s phone and welcoming me back.

Most people say that I am fatter, taller, my face is cleaner, and my hair is black! Ha ha. They have also “encouraged” me to be married by the age of 30…I have 6 months left.

Brook and I bought a couch, coffee table and chair for our living room. It is really cozy and cute now. I will post some pics soon of my house. The guys live below us and have already cooked two meals for us…I am liking this already:)

On a serious note, this adjustment has been a little harder than usual. I was in the States for so long and it is taking longer to jump back into things. I was praying yesterday and the Holy Spirit reminded me of John 15:5. “I am the vine and you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me, you can do nothing.” The last couple of months before I returned to Nepal, God was speaking over me that I am His friend. I am a friend of God. And as I sought the Lord, again He said, “You have served me before as a servant; this time I want you to serve as my friend.” What beautiful words. He is so faithful and has been my strength. Please continue to keep me in your prayers. There is a lot of spiritual darkness here. Please continue to pray that I would have peace and serve as the Spirit guides me.

Leaving on a jet plane…

Well, I leave tomorrow morning at 10am.  As I look back on my time home, I feel so blessed.  I am blessed by so many people that I have the opportunity to journey through life with.  I actually packed on Saturday and spent the last couple of days with those I love.  It is so amazing to love and be loved.  I have had so many people that have showered me with love these last days.  Thanks for the long talks, the CD’s, the delicious food, the prophetic words, the prayers, the encouragement, the boat rides, the cups of tea, the haircuts, the motorcycle rides, the laughter, and the tears.  It has been rich and real.  I have said my goodbyes, I have cried many tears, but I think I am ready to go.  I have been praying for God’s strength each day and I feel like I am covered in His grace.  Things I am looking forward to:

1.  Seeing my roomie Brook and the rest of the WMF community

2.  Hugging sweet Rekha Rai

3.  A huge, heaping plate of dal-bhaat

4.  Being again in a people-centered culture

5.  Seeing Jedi West

6.  Nepal humor

7.  Being asked 30 times a day when I am getting married:)

8.  Talking with my friends in the USA on Skype

9.  Dancing with Bipin in the streets

10.  Seeing Ajay and meeting Mukti for the first time

My only problem is that I have to bring eye drops that need to be at a temperature of 37-47 degrees  on the plane.  So I need to pack them in dry ice.  Having a backpack that is smoking is not such a good idea in this day and age.  It is going to be an interesting trip, folks.  And Calvin I see you in less than 24 hours….Woo hoo!

Tickets

I am in the process of buying my ticket to Nepal.  I leave on April 29th at 10AM.  It feels really weird that my life will be so drastically different in a little over 2 wks.  I am looking forward to seeing people, catching up over glasses of tea, and plates of daal-baat. (the real stuff, NOT the stuff I attempt to make.)

I called Jet Airways to work on getting a ticket from Delhi to Kathmandu.  And the lovely agent Andars gave me this confirmation code:  F as in Foxtrot, T as in Tango, V as in Victor, and N as in November.  Foxtrot…is that really the first word that you think of starting with F?

Oh, India.

A dream fulfilled…

In celebrating my less than three week away return to Nepal, I am going to share a story about life on the other side.  I went to the Nepali Eye Hospital with one of the guys from Kripaa Sadhan.  While I was there, I decided to have my eyes checked as well.  Big mistake.  I was told to lay on a stretcher and suddenly a man was shoving some tool towards my eye.  I jumped out of the bed…Parkinous…ma tyaari chhains.  “Wait, I am not ready!”  I asked him if I should first take out my contact lenses.  “What?!?  You are wearing lenses.  Of course you need to take them out.”  So without explaining what he was doing, he shoved the tool towards my eye again.  I guess it is the old-school tool used for checking eye pressures.  Then he diagnosed me with Glaucoma.  Umm, hello?  I was freaking out…  I asked him more questions about glaucoma and then he stated, “Oh, you don’t have glaucoma.”  Wonderful bedside manner.  That was my first and last visit to the Nepali eye hospital. 

But while I was there, I had my big break into the film industry of Nepal.  Or more accurately the “teach yourself english” DVD industry.  A Nepali woman approached me at the hospital and explained that her husband was looking for foreigners who would be willing to read English texts and be recorded.  For whatever reason it sounded like a blast to me.  I had this secret desire to do something like this because it would be hilarious.  I set up a time to meet him at his office. 

I was ushered into the office, force fed Chow Mein, and everyone laughed and joked that my name means “banana” in Nepali.  You know the jokes I have never heard before.  But I will say, I still laugh at them even though are really lame.:)  I was wearing a blue sweater that just happened to match the background in the recording room.  Great.  But do not fear because I can wear the sweater of the assistant who is a petite Nepali.  I came out wearing a turtleneck red sweater with snowflakes that was a little too tight.  I was ready for that moment to be documented.

The the fun part started.  I got to say things like, “Look at all the pigeons” while pointing in the air.  Or “I like oranges.”  Or “Do you like the white color sweater?”  I had to do this all without laughing and read the mistakes in English without changing my expression.  It was a challenge.  We had to start over numerous times when I was laughing.  Eventually we got done, I got paid (crazy!) and left for the day.

They liked me so much that I got called to be the Emcee at the DVD release party.  They rented out a hall and I got to meet the guy who was the other Emcee, “Graddy”.  Well after calling him “Graddy” for quite a while, he informed me that his name was really Grady.  We would have to introduce the people who were invited to give speeches.  The unfortunate part of it was that the man in charge failed to tell you who actually showed up.

My former Nepali teacher was one of the special guests.  I gave a heartfelt introduction telling the audience about the university class and what a privilege it was to introduce my teacher.  Blah, Blah, Blah.  “And I now present to you, Manjul (my teacher’s name)….”  Silence.  Again, “Manjul….”  Silence.  So I nervously moved on, tripping over Nepali names that I had never pronounced before.

Then they showed the video.  It was hilarious.  They overdid the graphics, considering I (on the video) was in Paris, at a park, at the beach, etc.  There were flames and fluorescent texts.  And they jumped from topic to topic so fast.  I am not sure if anyone could learn English from this tape. 

I do have a copy of the tape and if I can figure out how to post it, I will give you a sample.:) 

A lesson learned and other randomness…

I had an appointment today with my opthamologist. I had to take a vision field test which consisted of looking at this little light in a box and clicking a button when I saw other lights around it. She emphasized the importance of staying focused on that little light and not letting my eyes wander. Well, paranoid Kara was freaked out that she might have a serious vision problem so she did the most natural thing, of course…cheat on the test. I really tried hard to stay focused on the little light, but would occasionally sneak a glance at other areas of the box to “improve” my chances of passing the test. Well folks, my philosophy backfired. The doctor said the test report was rubbish and that I was only looking at the little light 25% of the time. OOOPPPPS! So I have to go back next week and do the same thing again. Moral of the story….Don’t cheat on your vision tests!

I had a great weekend. I spent some time with good friends and had a girls night out with my sisters. We went to San Chez and the food was delicious. We then watched old home videos and laughed a lot. We were making up mock elections for people. Mine was Most Awkward…I can’t help it if the video was filmed during the junior high years.:) I had feathered bangs, long hair, braces, and these big blue glasses with diamonds on the sides. (well, not really diamonds, i am not that posh). It was hot, I must say.

We celebrated Mike and Jon’s birthdays this weekend. (my brothers) The weather was gorgeous and the water on the lake had melted. We fed the geese and played outside with our nephews. My nephew RJ is six years old and wants to be a pediatrician when he gets older. He said he wanted to invent a cure for cancer. I was asking him how he was going to make it. “Well, you have to mix every color of the rainbow together and first it will be dark. But then it will become light and it will taste like everything you have ever tasted.” Precious.

I am enjoying these last few weeks with the people I love. It will be hard to say goodbye, especially to my little nephews.

Some Nepal Pics

The view from my apartment in Kathmandu

Some friends from the Teku slum

My favorite little friend

Trying to look scary, but he is just too cute